First of all, I’m sorry.
I had to bring her up if we were to discuss this.
Browsing the Associated Press wire today, I found a story about the upcoming E3, the Electronic Entertainment Expo for video games, which starts tomorrow. I found three photos for that story. One of them was a file photo of Paris Hilton.
Thing is, the story really has nothing to do with her.
So when I read the cutline (that’s the caption, for people who speak normal English), I found this unbelievable sentence:
“There will be no celebrity appearances from the likes of Paris Hilton ...”
In the most uncanny move to make the irrelevant relevant, the first paragraph of the story ends with this:
“Celebrity appearances from the likes of Paris Hilton or Snoop Dogg are a thing of the past, too.”
As I said before, I’m sorry for bringing her up.
So here’s my apology, via MSNBC’s Mika Brzezinski:
Hilton was at E3 once, so the almighty AP decided in its infinite wisdom that she was relevant for this year’s story.
Well, I lived in Albany for two years, so from now (and applying its same formula), the AP should include me in every story about the state politics.
Here’s a token:
ORIGINAL: ALBANY, N.Y. (AP) — Despite their recent feuding, Governor Eliot Spitzer said Monday he has a "fine" relationship with Senate Majority Leader Joseph Bruno.
“IMPROVED”: ALBANY, N.Y. (AP) — Despite their recent feuding, Governor Eliot Spitzer said Monday he has a "fine" relationship with Senate Majority Leader Joseph Bruno. One-time Albany resident Ivan Lajara -- who once saw Gov. Spitzer when he was state attorney general -- visited the Legislature once and even pressed the “Nay” button in the Senate chambers, even though he was told not to touch anything.
How’s that for news.