Wednesday, February 13, 2008

How to blog

Research shows that blogging is increasingly becoming an indispensable source for news. And my sources tell me that almost everybody has a blog these days.

Just in case you don't have a blog, here are some rules for proper blogging:

* When you don't know what you are talking about, say "research shows."

* When you make stuff up, say “my sources tell me” (“Some people say” also works).
Example: “My sources tell me other bloggers are going to hate this post.”

* EMPHASIZE YOUR SENTENCES WITH CAPITAL LETTERS. READERS LIKE WHEN YOU DO THIS (AND DON'T FORGET TO ADD EXCLAMATION MARKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

* Include information which should be easily obtained by reading other media and pass it as your own (Freeman reporters will appreciate that). And don't forget to decry the source where you’ve got your information as biased.

* Make sure you include a typoooooo.

* Steal a copyrighted image from a Web site and include it in your post. Like this:



* Include an embarrassing video of a politician that has nothing to do with the issues or the campaign.



* Include an expired or broken link.

* Say “LOL” but make sure you sound bitchy.

* Include an irrelevant poll:

Example:

Are you kidding me?

A. Yes.
B. No.
C. All of the above.

* Say "You're welcome"

You're welcome.